


A Separate Peace

by romanticalgirl



Category: Dawson's Creek
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-11
Updated: 2014-02-11
Packaged: 2018-01-11 23:19:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1179129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romanticalgirl/pseuds/romanticalgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Originally posted 9/6/01</p>
    </blockquote>





	A Separate Peace

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted 9/6/01

Pacey slid the door open and entered the dark apartment, looking around warily. He reached for the light switch, stopping when he heard the distinct sound of a gun being cocked.

"Leave the lights off."

He shrugged and dropped his hand, breathing as soon as he heard the safety click. "I heard rumors, but I didn't believe it."

"Yeah? What rumors did you hear?"

"That my very straight laced brother, who has never done anything wrong or strange in his entire life, had locked himself in his apartment and no one's seen him in a week."

"That's a pretty good rumor."

Pacey snapped on the lights and flinched, though not from the brightness. The shades were drawn, the normally immaculate room was in complete disarray, and his impeccable brother had a scraggly beard, a gun in his lap, and an ocean of empty bottles surrounding his chair. His eyes were eclipsed by the dark bags underneath them and his skin seemed slack from the weight loss. "Jesus."

Doug smirked and took a drink from the bottle in his hand. "Wanna drink, Pace?"

"I'm not old enough."

"Right. Like that's ever stopped you. Come on, have a drink or two. Trust me, it'll make you feel better."

"You don't look like you feel better."

"I don't feel better," Doug agreed. "I don't feel anything."

"So why are you still drinking?"

Doug laughed, dark and bitter. "Because if I stop drinking, I'll start feeling. I would think you'd have this shit figured out, Pace. I mean, you went through this, didn't you?"

"What are you going through, Doug?"

"You really don't know?" Doug's eyebrow rose in disbelief. "You can't be that stupid, little brother."

"No. I'm not." Pacey walked over to the couch and sat down, pushing plates and pizza boxes out of his way with his foot. "I was sort of hoping you'd talk about it if I asked, though. I think you need to talk about it."

"Yeah? You think so?" Doug took another long drink, not looking away from Pacey. "You think it'll help me to talk? To get it all off my chest?"

"Can it be any worse than this?" Pacey gestured at the room. "Look at yourself, Doug."

"If you don't like the view, Pacey, get the fuck out." Doug smirked as Pacey's eyes widened at the profanity. "I'm sorry, does my bitter recrimination not fit in with the picture of me you have in your head?" Doug set his gun on the table beside his chair and stood up, waving the bottle around. "Does the fact that I swear and drink and eat crappy fast food and leave my house in a complete fucking mess not fit in with the image my little brother has of me?" Doug was instantly in his face, angry and sad and hurting. "Well, gee, I'm really not sorry in the slightest."

Pacey sat there, unmoved, as Doug slumped to the floor, blissful in his unconsciousness.

 

~**~  
"Hey."

Bessie looked up from the deep fryer, pushing her hair out of her face with the back of her hand. She smiled widely, brightening her tired face. "Hey," she said softly.

"What time are you finished?"

"Mom and Dad are out tonight, so I'm closing everything up."

"Need help?"

She shrugged and tilted her head toward the back. "Aprons are back there."

Doug slipped behind the counter and grabbed an apron off one of the hooks, pulling it over his head and tying it behind his back. "What do you want me to do?"

She lifted a basket from the fryer and dumped the contents into the waiting rack. Arranging the pieces of fish in the bed of fries, she handed it to him. "Take this and a large Coke to table five."

"Which one is table five?"

"The one with the people sitting at it." She waited as Doug walked past her, slapping his ass as he did so. He gave her a smirk over his shoulder and headed over to the table, his smile wide as he approached the group of tourists.

Bessie watched him for a few moments before turning back to the fryers, snapping them off as Doug flirted with the group of girls sitting around the table. She turned and leaned on the counter, watching him as he spoke, a small smile playing across her lips as he deftly dodged a random hand as one of the girls reached out to touch him. She continued watching him as he walked back toward her and sat on the stool opposite her.

"She's watching you."

"Yeah? You jealous?"

She shrugged and reached out for his hand, squeezing it. She tilted her head and smiled at him. "Should I be?"

Doug watched as she licked her lips, leaving them with a soft pink shimmer, sighing softly under his breath. "Where's Joey?"

"Dawson's."

"Where are your folks?"

"Boston."

"When do we close?"

"As soon as your admirers leave."

"We can't just kick 'em out?" He slid off the stool and released her hand, walking back behind the counter. Bessie didn't move, just smiled pleasantly at the three girls at the table, pretending they weren't watching as Doug moved behind her, his hands on her hips, his breath hot on her neck. "I'll pay their bill?"

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as his words played across her the damp skin of her neck. "That's up to them."

He pulled her back against him, moving their bodies together. She shivered as she felt the press of his erection against her ass, hard even through his jeans. "As soon as they're gone, we can close this place down, go back to your house and…"

"Excuse me?" One of the girls was at the counter, her glass in her hand. "I'd like a refill, please."

"Certainly," Bessie swallowed hard and took the glass from her, hoping no one would notice her hand shaking. She refilled the glass and set it down on the counter. "Is there anything else we can get you?"

"No. Actually, I wanted to file a complaint."

"A complaint?"

"My friends and I don't appreciate having to watch this display you two are putting on while we're trying to eat."

"Oh really?" Doug moved from behind Bessie and stepped up to the counter. "Well then, why don't you and your country-club friends get your things and leave? Because our 'display,' as you put it, is only going to get more heated, if for no other reason than to offend your delicate sensibilities."

"You do realize all you're doing is jeopardizing your business."

"And what a horrible existence it will be for us if you never frequented the Ice House again." Doug moved from behind the counter and walked over to the front door. "Have a nice night, ladies."

Bessie tried not to smile as the three girls left in an angry huff, managing to keep it hidden until Doug locked the door behind them. "You know," she tried to reprimand him, "you could very well be doing serious damage to my family business."

"If I have to eat fried clams for the rest of my life, I swear that I won't let them drive you under." He leaned back against the door and smiled at her, his blue eyes twinkling. "Come here."

"We have to clean up, Doug." Bessie moved out from behind the counter and started toward the girls' table. She kept one eye on him as she started placing the red, plastic baskets on the tray. He moved across the room with a deliberate, predatory stride and caught her by the waist.

"I want to get dirty." He licked her neck, his hands moving up to cup her breasts. "Right here, right now, Bess."

"Do…oug." She moaned his name softly as she arched into his touch. "I have to get this done."

"Mmm," he whispered, his mouth moving up her neck to her earlobe. Shivers raced through her as he continued speaking, his lips, tongue, and teeth grazing her skin. "We will. But there's something I'd rather do first."

~**~  
Pacey tossed the last of the empty bottles in the recycling and stretched, rubbing his lower back. He smelled like booze and sweat and the desperation of a man who had locked himself in his apartment for a week. He sighed and grabbed the bin, moving over to the door.

Setting it down on the back porch, he leaned against the railing and stared out at the small lawn that led out to the creek. "Jesus. Is the sun always this fucking bright?"

"Only when you return from the dead." Pacey looked Doug over and shook his head. "You look worse than before you crashed."

"What are you still doing here?"

"Cleaning. Your house was a fucking mess." Pacey headed back into the apartment, pushing past Doug. "I mean, even the divas were out of alphabetical order, Doug. That's a sign that you need some serious help."

"And that's you, is it?"

"I'm the closest thing you've got, bro." Pacey grabbed a beer from the refrigerator and snapped it open, then set it down on the counter. Before Doug could grab for it, Pacey shoved a cup of coffee into his hand. "Nu-uh. You're sobering up."

Doug stood there facing his brother for a long moment before he dumped the coffee onto the floor and grabbed the beer. "Let me tell you something, little brother. I'm the adult here and I'll fucking do what I want, when I want. Especially in my own fucking house. And if you don't like it, well, you can just get your ass out."

Pacey stared down at the dark liquid soaking his shoes. "You want to tell me about this, Doug?"

"Not in the slightest."

"You think drinking yourself into a fucking oblivion is going to do anything?"

"I told you, Pace. It's already made me numb. Until you came along and interrupted what was building up to be a nice steady buzz."

"You've been on a bender for a fucking week, Doug."

"No." Doug shook his head and finished off the beer, tossing the bottle into the sink and smiling as Pacey winced at the sound of glass breaking. "I've only been drinking for two days. But give me a few more days and I'll be happy to live up to the reputation. It'll be nice, Pace. You won't be the family loser for a while."

"You want me to give up. I won't."

"Why the fuck not?"

"Because you didn't give up on me." They stared at each other defiantly, blue eyes locked. "And because I know what it's like when the woman you love is in love with somebody else."

~**~  
Bessie climbed in the truck and slid all the way across the seat to kiss him, her lips like sugar against his. He nibbled her lower lip before pushing her away. "Seat belt."

"You'd think your father was the sheriff or something." She clicked the belt into place. "So, where are we headed?"

"Somewhere remote. Away from siblings and restaurants and responsibilities." He reached out for her hand and squeezed it before putting the truck into reverse. "Sound good?"

"Sounds unreal." She leaned against the window and closed her eyes. "Joey was a monstrous brat last night. Shouting at me about something that I supposedly did. Like I care about her diary." She laughed. "Dear diary, today I realized that I love Dawson. Not love like you're supposed to love your friends but the deep and abiding love of a woman."

"Joey's like…seven."

"Yeah. Well, I think she copied out of a romance novel that Mom was reading." She sighed and rubbed her eyes. "And then Mom and Dad had a huge fight. Screaming and accusing and scaring the hell out of Joey."

"Joey?"

"Both of us," she shrugged. "So I didn't get much sleep."

"Well, then I just have perfect timing, don't I?" He reached over and switched on the radio, turning the music down so it was just softly in the background. "We've got a drive. Why don't you get some rest?"

"Not much of a date."

He reached over and tugged at a lock of her hair. She smiled at him sleepily. "I'm not dating you so you can entertain me, Bess. I'm dating you because I want to be with you."

"Still…"

"Go to sleep, beautiful. I'll wake you when we get there."

He watched her sleep as he drove, taking the long way to their destination so that she could sleep longer. Finally, he pulled the truck to a stop alongside a deserted stretch of beach.

Slipping out as quietly as he could, he grabbed everything from the back and hauled it down toward the water's edge before coming back to the truck and carefully opening her door.

Bessie sniffed quietly and burrowed deeper into the seat. "Not now, lemme sleep."

"Hey," he whispered softly. "We're here."

"Wha?" She opened her eyes slowly. "Oh. Hey."

"C'mon." He helped her to her feet and led her down to the water.

"Where are we?"

"A little place I know." He gestured to the blanket. "You can sleep again, if you want."

"No," she lay down on it and watched as he did the same, facing her. "I'd rather keep my eyes open and look at you."

"I'd say Joey's not the only one who's been reading that romance novel." He reached out and touched her on the tip of her nose. "You look all hazy."

"What?" She rubbed at her face until he grabbed her wrist and stopped her.

"You look sexy."

"Oh." She felt the blush creep up her cheeks. "So, what are we doing here?"

"Just having a day off." His hand released hers and moved down to slowly unbutton her shirt. "Lazy, relaxing, slow, easy day off."

Bessie watched his hand as he unfastened her shirt then slid it off her shoulder. "We're just going to lie here on the beach?"

Doug moved closer, kissing her shoulder. "Mmm-hmm."

"Oh," Bessie rolled onto her back as Doug moved over her, easing her shirt off her other arm. He unhooked her bra and slipped it out of the way. Her second "Oh" was sharper as he captured her nipple in his mouth, sucking on the taut flesh.

Her fingers wove through his hair as he kissed his way down her stomach to the top of her shorts. He unhooked the button and slid the zipper down before she pushed him away.

"Doug?" Her eyes were wide and dark with desire, her bare chest rising and falling rapidly. He sat up and she crept toward him, grabbing his shirt and pulling it over his head. As soon as he was free of it, she pushed him back on the blanket and undid his belt buckle. He arched his hips as she slid his jeans down his body, leaving them pooled at his feet as she moved forward and wrapped her hot mouth around his cock.

She eased between his legs, her breasts crushed to his thighs as her mouth moved over him, her tongue caressing his length as she sucked at the hard flesh. Doug moaned soft and low as one of his hands dug into the blanket, the other stroking her hair.

She pulled back, breathing heavy as she tugged her shorts down her legs. Doug sat up and grabbed at his jeans, fishing his wallet from the pocket and pulling out a condom. His hands trembled with excitement as he slid it on and lay back, watching her as she straddled him, sliding onto his cock with a shuddering sigh.

Doug reached up and captured her face between his hands, raising his body up so that he could kiss her, his tongue hard against hers as it slipped into her mouth. Bessie pushed him down, capturing his hands and placing them over her breasts, squeezing lightly. Doug groaned and followed her lead, rubbing his thumbs over the nipples as he massaged the creamy flesh.

Bessie rolled her hips, grinding down against him in a slow, steady rhythm as he arched off the blanket, meeting her every thrust. The sand moved beneath the blanket as they lost themselves in one another, the sound of the waves crashing on the nearby shore setting the pace for their lovemaking.

Doug's hands trembled against her skin as she began gasping soft, sexy breaths that left him weak. He whispered her name as her body closed around him, the gentle crush of her muscles wrapped around his cock, squeezing him as she came all around him. He continued thrusting, moaning softly as she collapsed above him, her body spasming as he buried his climax inside her.

~**~  
"So." Pacey ignored the blaring voice of some tortured, female singer as he turned the stereo down. "Are you going to go?"

Doug looked up from his gun, the smell of cleaning oil heavy in the air. "Go where?"

"You really want me to say? Or you want to just stop playing dumb and answer my question?"

Doug shrugged. "Why should I go?"

"You shouldn't," Pacey agreed. "Which is why I want to know if you actually plan to, and would you please put that fucking gun away?"

Doug set the service revolver on the table and looked at Pacey. "I have absolutely no desire to see Bessie and Bodie enter into the bonds of holy matrimony. I have absolutely no desire to see Bessie at all, for that matter."

"And this doesn't bother you?"

"Not in the slightest." He looked over at his brother, something dangerous in his eyes. "And I really don't want to talk about this anymore. Ever."

"So when it's all over, you're just going to go back to normal?"

"I've been normal for the past eleven years, Pacey. I don't think it'll be too much of a stretch."

"You're falling apart, Doug."

"No. I'm not." He shook his head. "I'm perfectly together. And as soon as this wedding is over and I don't have to hear another fucking word about it, everything will commence to being just fine."

"You really believe that?"

Doug picked up the gun again. "Don't you?"

~**~  
"Do…oug?" Bessie's voice was thick with tears as soon as he answered the phone.

"Bess? What is it, honey?"

"I need to see you. Please? It's…it's urgent."

"Where are you?"

"My house. Please, I just…I need you, Doug."

He slammed down the phone and was out the door before it settled in the receiver, speeding every mile to her house. The car wasn't completely stopped when he cranked up the emergency brake and jumped out, rushing over to the front door.

"Over here."

She was huddled on the dock, her legs pulled up to her chin and her face flushed with sorrow. He rushed over to her and gathered her into his arms. "What is it, baby?"

She pulled away slightly and looked up at him, her eyes brimming over with crystal tears. "We have a problem."

"What?" He brushed her cheek, smoothing away damp tendrils of hair and salty tears that had slipped from her lashes. "What is it? Tell me, honey."

She bit her lower lip and shook her head, unwilling to meet his eyes. "I…"

"Bessie?" His voice was as gentle as his touch as he lifted her chin. "Tell me."

"I'm pregnant."

"Oh." He leaned back slightly, his eyes wide. "You're…you're sure?"

"No. I'm fucking making this up!" Her voice flared with anger, still deep with her tears. "What do you think?"

"I'm sorry." He shook his head, trying to placate her. "I'm just…I'm as shocked as you. We were so careful."

"Not careful enough." She moved away from him, suddenly unable to let him touch her. "What am I going to do?"

"What are we going to do," he corrected her. "We got into this together, Bess. We'll deal with it together."

"I want an abortion."

He swallowed hard as she stared out at the creek, refusing to look at him. Her body was stiff with anger and pain. "You're sure?"

"No. I want to be sixteen and an unwed mother. Of course I'm fucking sure."

"You wouldn't be…you wouldn't have to be…unwed."

"I'm sure your father would love to have me as his daughter-in-law, spoiling all your chances for your future."

"This isn't about my father, Bess. This is about us. I love you."

"That doesn't matter. It's my body, Doug. My life. I want an abortion."

He nodded and looked away from her, staring out at the water as well. "Let me know what I can do."

"I need a ride to Boston tomorrow. And I need five hundred dollars."

"Tomorrow?"

"The sooner the better." She looked at his profile, tried not to notice the tears standing in his eyes. "Don't you think?"

"Whatever you want, Bess." He got to his feet and looked down at her. "Why don't we go inside?"

"Why don't you just go?"

He nodded, watching as a tear fell and stained the wood of the dock. "What time tomorrow?"

"I'll be on the porch waiting at seven."

He walked away without looking back, unable to handle the sight of her alone. He gunned the truck and peeled out of the driveway, the muffled roar hiding the sound of both their sobs.

~**~  
Doug looked up as Pacey came back into the room. "Haven't you left yet?"

"Not quite." He dumped a load of laundry onto the sofa and started folding shirts.

"What are you doing? You realize that you fold shirts like a heathen?"

"Well, we can't all have the innate ability of a gay man." Pacey grinned as Doug ripped the shirt out of his hands and started folding it. "Feeling better?"

"Leave me the fuck alone."

Pacey started matching socks, watching Doug out of the corner of his eye. "You ever going to tell anyone about it?"

"What?"

"What happened. You guys were hot and heavy and then you just stopped. Something happen?"

"We were going in different directions, that's all." Doug shrugged and grabbed another shirt. "You know what that's like."

"I do. Which is why I don't believe you." Pacey didn't laugh, although the humor was in his eyes. "You're both still here in Capeside, Dougie. Neither of you have moved on, although Bessie's actually managed to move on with her life. Maybe if you told someone…"

"Pacey?"

He looked over at his brother, the danger back in his voice. "Yeah?"

"Drop it."

"Did you break her heart, Doug? Or did she break yours?"

Doug smiled and got out of his chair, heading for the other room. "Yes."

~**~  
Doug pulled off the road on the outskirts of town, shutting down the engine. Bessie continued to stare out the passenger side window, her fingers pulling at her bottom lip. "Are you okay? Really?"

"I don't know."

He could still hear the sound in his head; still see the tears that leaked from her eyes of their own volition. "Is there anything I can do, Bess?" He reached out to touch her, closing his eyes and pulling his hand back as she jerked away from him.

"You've done enough." He nodded and started the car again, pulling back onto the highway. Bessie looked at him with her heart in her eyes. "Doug?"

"Yeah?"

"I'll pay back the money."

"Don't worry about the money." His voice was colder than he'd intended, his hurt sneaking through the cracks in his armor. "The money's nothing."

"I'd feel better…"

"And I wouldn't." His hands curled around the steering wheel until his knuckles were white. "Like you said, I've done enough, Bess. I got you into this, I paid to get you out of it."

"I didn't mean…" Her chest hurt from crying, from the pain of hurting and hurting him. It felt like sharp knives piercing her heart as his eyes stayed locked on the road. "What are we going to tell people?"

"About the abortion?"

She flinched at the word. "About us."

"Whatever you want, Bess."

"I'm asking what you want."

He pulled the car off the road again and looked at her, his blue eyes pools of hurt. "Why do you want to know what I want now? You didn't want to know yesterday and I can't imagine why you want to know now."

There was no accusation in the words, but they stung nonetheless. "If we don't settle on a story, people will think it's something more. And Capeside's a small town."

"Whatever you want to say, Bessie. This is your show."

"Why are you being so mean to me?" She hated that she sounded so like a child, so weak. "I thought you wanted to be supportive, I thought…"

"In the space of a day, I've lost my child and my girlfriend," Doug's voice was flat, too far beyond emotion to hold anything. "And my girlfriend doesn't seem to care that I lost either." He looked at her, felt bad for her tears. "I'm so sorry you had to go through this, Bess. I'm sorry that we weren't care…I wasn't careful enough. But I can't give you meaningless drivel about what we're going to tell the busybodies at Capeside High right now. I hurt too much." He pulled back onto the road, and they rode in silence the rest of the way back to her house.

She slipped out of the car, holding onto the door and staring at him for a long moment, memorizing the lines of his face. Doug sighed and looked at her, remembering her.

"I'll pick you up for school tomorrow, if you feel like going. We'll get our story straight then."

"Thank you, Doug."

He laughed. "You've got nothing to thank me for."

~**~  
Pacey didn't hear a word that was said the entire service. He couldn't concentrate on anything as he watched the small crowd smile and sigh as Bessie and Bodie both said their vows. He sat in the back row, watching everyone else as all of their attention was focused on the couple in the front.

Doug sat down beside him, smelling shaved and showered and nothing like the man he'd left back at the apartment.

"You going to make a scene?"

"No," Doug shook his head. "I guess I just need to see for myself."

"She's happy."

"I know."

"Are you?"

Bessie turned and faced Bodie, her cheeks wet with tears, her eyes shining with love and joy. Doug took a deep breath. "Most of the time."

"You okay with this?"

His body flinched as he heard her say the two words that he needed to hear but he nodded at his brother. "Most of the time."

"You're not going to do something stupid like stand up and interrupt the ceremony and embarrass the hell out of me, are you?"

There was no answer and Pacey looked at the pew then at the door, watching Doug slip out as the preacher asked everyone to speak now or forever hold his peace.


End file.
